The Fault in Our Stars: Book and Movies

I know this movie and book from Chika and Adhit. They told me how these movie and book have saddest-meaningful love story. Huuum sad story, then... I barely cried to any sad story that I've been watched or read. Let's try this out, I thought. So, I searched for its trailer on Youtube.

First thing came to my mind was, Wow, I just love the casts! They're beautiful enough to be watched. Since then I decided to find out more. Adhit gave me the e-book and I made a plan to watch the movie. I just read less than 10 chapters of the book from 25 chapters then I went to movies. It's a story about Hazel and Gus, two teenagers, who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

Here are the casts:

I was directly just in love with the story. The movie and the book, as I already finished it, doesn’t have wide differences. Some part just been cut from the book in the movies to make it properly nice as a movie. For short, they both (book and movie) are amazing as they are.

Hazel intro on the movie

Hazel Grace Lancaster (16); oh I love name Hazel because makes me imagining how delightful hazelnut coffee is; met this young boy, Augustus Waters (17) in the support group. Hazel has thyroid cancer originally but with an impressive and long-settled satellite colony in her lungs. Gus has a little touch of osteosarcoma a year and a half ago. Her mom thought that Hazel will have depression (as the side effect of dying as Hazel thinks) if she’s only at home and see no other people beside her parents. So, her mom always encourages her to go to support group of cancer and to make some friends. Then, here comes Augustus, usually called as Gus, who had a crush on Hazel since the very first eye contact.

In the support group

"Because you're beautiful"

It's a metaphor

I like the way Gus likes Hazel right from the very first time. I like the way Gus gets the phone from Hazel and says, “Hazel Grace!” instead of “Hallo”. I love the way they say unending ‘okay’ and becoming their thing. Falling in love could be everyone’s including sick people, couldn’t it? Only how you made it less imperfect and be grateful for it.

On the phone

Hazel and Gus's texts

Hazel reads one book for so many times, titled An Imperial Affliction. It’s a book about cancer also and she shares it to Gus. She admires the author, Peter Van Houten, very much. One day, Gus can grant Hazel’s wish to see Mr. Van Houten in Amsterdam to ask the continuity of the book and they’re going with Hazel mom. In Amsterdam, Gus finally tells that he loves Hazel with his very honestly truly beautiful words, they meet the douchebag Van Houten and get no answer, their first kiss and first also the last love making, also Gus finally tells Hazel that he gets her cancer back… Goods and bads happened in Amsterdam.

On the flight

Amsterdam

Had a romantic dinner at Oranjee as Mr. and Mrs. Waters, sponsored by Lidewij (Van Houten assistant)

So, finally Gus tells Hazel he loves her by these beautiful words:

Hazel's letter to Gus

Hard truth, hard life

After they get back to America, all Gus does only treatment for his cancer and resting. In short, Gus and Hazel make a eulogy for their each other’s funeral.

Isaac’s eulogy for Gus:

“But I will say this: When the scientists of the future show up at my house with robot eyes and they tell me to try them on, I will tell the scientists to screw off, because I do not want to see a world without him.”

Hazel’s eulogy for Gus:

“I can’t talk about our love story, so I will talk about math. I am not a mathematician, but I know this: There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.”

Augustus Waters died eight days after his pre-funeral, at Memorial, in the ICU, when the cancer, which was made of him, finally stopped his heart, which was also made of him. For the last time, Gus made something for Hazel through Van Houten:
Van Houten,

I’m a good person but a shitty writer. You’re a shitty person but a good writer. We’d make a good team. I don’t want to ask you any favors, but if you have time—and from what I saw, you have plenty—I was wondering if you could write a eulogy for Hazel. I’ve got notes and everything, but if you could just make it into a coherent whole or whatever? Or even just tell me what I should say differently.

Here’s the thing about Hazel: Almost everyone is obsessed with leaving a mark upon the world. Bequeathing a legacy. Outlasting death.

We all want to be remembered. I do, too. That’s what bothers me most, is being another unremembered casualty in the ancient and inglorious war against disease.

I want to leave a mark.

But Van Houten: The marks humans leave are too often scars. You build a hideous minimall or start a coup or try to become a rock star and you think, “They’ll remember me now,” but (a) they don’t remember you, and (b) all you leave behind are more scars. Your coup becomes a dictatorship. Your minimall becomes a lesion. (Okay, maybe I’m not such a shitty writer. But I can’t pull my ideas together, Van Houten. My thoughts are stars I can’t fathom into constellations.)

We are like a bunch of dogs squirting on fire hydrants. We poison the groundwater with our toxic piss, marking everything MINE in a ridiculous attempt to survive our deaths. I can’t stop pissing on fire hydrants. I know it’s silly and useless—epically useless in my current state—but I am an animal like any other.

Hazel is different. She walks lightly, old man. She walks lightly upon the earth. Hazel knows the truth: We’re as likely to hurt the universe as we are to help it, and we’re not likely to do either.

People will say it’s sad that she leaves a lesser scar that fewer remember her, that she was loved deeply but not widely. But it’s not sad, Van Houten. It’s triumphant. It’s heroic. Isn’t that the real heroism? Like the doctors say: First, do no harm.

The real heroes anyway aren’t the people doing things; the real heroes are the people NOTICING things, paying attention. The guy who invented the smallpox vaccine didn’t actually invent anything. He just noticed that people with cowpox didn’t get smallpox.

After my PET scan lit up, I snuck into the ICU and saw her while she was unconscious. I just walked in behind a nurse with a badge and I got to sit next to her for like ten minutes before I got caught. I really thought she was going to die before I could tell her that I was going to die, too. It was brutal: the incessant mechanized haranguing of intensive care. She had this dark cancer water dripping out of her chest. Eyes closed. Intubated. But her hand was still her hand, still warm and the nails painted this almost black dark blue and I just held her hand and tried to imagine the world without us and for about one second I was a good enough person to hope she died so she would never know that I was going, too. But then I wanted more time so we could fall in love. I got my wish, I suppose. I left my scar.

A nurse guy came in and told me I had to leave, that visitors weren’t allowed, and I asked if she was doing okay, and the guy said, “She’s still taking on water.” A desert blessing, an ocean curse.

What else? She is so beautiful. You don’t get tired of looking at her. You never worry if she is smarter than you: You know she is. She is funny without ever being mean. I love her. I am so lucky to love her, Van Houten. You don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices. I hope she likes hers.

Gus, Isaac, and Hazel throw eggs to Monica’s car (Isaac’s ex) as a revenge of the Isaac-dump-ness

They drink champagne for the last time together

Okay...

“You realize that trying to keep your distance from me will not lessen my affection for you. All efforts to save me from you will fail,” Gus said.

I think the story is so damn simple and ordinary, but it contains humanity thing that sometime we forget about and it shows us how we should see things, and again, how we could be so grateful for the life we’re living. My watching partner said after watch this movie, more or less, “Sometimes we could be so grateful and appreciate things very well when we are under (sick)”. I couldn’t agree more.

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Yeah, It's Life

Halo semuanya! Long time no blogging. Terus sekarang tiba-tiba aku pengen ceritain sebuah kisah, sebuah kisah universal yang semua orang bisa alamin, dan ini kisah yang berdasarkan kejadian aseli. Sebenernya ini jadi seperti sebuah jawaban dari postingan seseorang di blognya. Aku gamau terlalu mempermasalahkan isi postingannya, tapi aku rasa postingan aku ini bisa ngejawab apa yang dia selama ini galaukan di segala penjuru akun sosialnya yang dia post ke semua orang, maupun yang tunjukkan ke satu atau dua orang. Dan ini blogku, ini ekspresiku juga J

Gambar 1.1 Quotes

“Karena NYAMAN bisa ngebuat orang lupa kalau mereka hanya sebatas teman, right? Kenyamanan, bahaya yang paling dicari orang. Itu saja.”

Zona nyaman. Kalo istilah kerennya comfort zone. Ketika kamu udah terlena sama kenyamanan dengan seseorang, dan bagaimana kamu ngerasa dispesialkan oleh orang itu, otak logis kamu pasti akan ter-distract sama hal-hal yang ada dan sedang terjadi di belakangnya. Yang kamu tau dan percaya cuma apa yang ada di depanmu dan apa yang diberitahu padamu.

Ya, aku adalah anak pertama. Aku memegang teguh prinsip bahwa aku harus bisa jadi contoh untuk adik-adikku dan kebanggaan orangtua, nenek-kakekku yang aku sudah anggap seperti orangtuaku, dan semua kerabatku yang percaya bahwa aku sedang berada di jalan yang baik dan ga pernah berhenti doain. Alhamdulillah aku masih memiliki orangtua yang utuh dan orangtuaku masih bersama sampai sekarang (tapi bukan berarti adem ayem aja sih, topan tsunami badai sudah merajalela semenjak aku masih kecil).  Dan didikan ayah dan mamaku dari dulu udah buat aku jadi anak yang bener-bener mandiri dan bisa siap ambil segala konsekuensi dari apa yang dipilih dan dilakukan, karena mereka bener-bener apa-apa yang serba “terserah aku”.

Sebenernya aku disini  bukan mau ceritain soal diri aku sendiri, tapi tentang seseorang yang punya hati baik dan tulus, tapi dalamnya sepi. Aku engga kasihan, ga boleh, karena kok aku terkesan sombong, tapi aku justru pengen buat dia semangat dan ga jatuh di lubang yang sama. ini persepsiku loh, dan ini dari apa yang aku pelajari dari depan menurut penuturanmu, dan cerita di belakangmu menurut penuturan yang lain. Jadi jangan anggap aku hanya mengigau dan ga tau apa-apa seperti anak kecil yang kehilangan pegangan tangan mamanya. Dan jangan anggap aku jahat karena aku juga wanita, sama sepertimu, kurang lebih aku mengerti apa yang kamu rasa. Dan jangan berpikir bahwa hidupku hanya sibuk mengurusi masalah percintaan yang tidak ada hubungannya dengan masa depanku. Aku ga senaif dan sekanak-kanak itu, aku cuma bisa membagi mana yang bagiku penting dan tidak untuk diperhatikan, dan bagiku ada yang harus sedikit diluruskan disini, kamu special, Kaka Peri :3

Aku sudah bisa merasakan gimana kamu ngerasa nyaman bisa deket dan bertukar pikiran dengan si Mas semenjak kalian bareng di desa itu. Keliatan kok kalo seorang cewek itu ngerasa nyaman sama sesuatu, dia ga segan buat selalu nunjukin ke orang-orang kebahagiannya itu, apalagi dengan perangaimu yang sangat update seperti itu. Mungkin sebelumnya kamu berpikir untuk mundur karena si Mas yang kamu sayang ini sudah memiliki pacar, tapi apa daya, lagi lagi sifat perempuan yang mudah dan senang dibuai. Dengan pada dasarnya kamu yang sudah suka dan memiliki rasa, dibuai dengan segala perhatian, rayuan, dan kata-kata manis yang sudah lama tidak kamu rasakan dari seorang lelaki. Belum lagi bagaimana si Mas memberitahumu bahwa ia sudah tidak merasa nyaman dengan pacarnya, semakin melonjaklah rasa dalam dadamu. Semakin hari semakin merasa dekat, karena obrolan yang tiada kunjung berhenti, segala ucapan selamat pagi sampai selamat malam dengan begitu manja dan mesranya kalian lontarkan satu sama lain. Tidak lupa diselipkan kata ‘sayang’ dan ‘kecup-kecup’ diantaranya. Dan kamu pun terbuai. Kamu tau bahwa si Mas dan kekasihnya tiada kunjung berakhir, tapi kamu selalu diberikan pengertian bahwa kamulah yang terpilih, kamulah yang special. Kamu lagi-lagi dibuai dengan kata-kata lelaki,”Kita jalani saja dulu begini, kalo aku sih lagi gamau sama siapa-siapa, tapi kalo ada yang sampe punya rasa beneran diantara kita, biar pajak ditanggung pemenang” Santai. Itulah yang kamu rasakan, padahal hal tidak jelas tersebut yang akan menjadi boomerang bagimu di masa depan. Sebuah pengharapan semu yang justru malah membuat kamu bertahan. Otak logis disini lagi-lagi mulai dikesampingkan, otak perasalah yang memilih untuk tetap mau diperlakukan seperti itu. Selagi itu terus berjalan, perasaanmu terus tumbuh.

Semua itu terus menerus berlangsung sampai rasa sayang dan peduli yang begitu besar pun muncul dalam dirimu, bukan hanya rasa empati karena keadaan si Masmu yang sedang susah. Rasa sayang itu terus dijaga oleh dirimu sampai suatu saat kamu menanyakan pada si Mas, “Kalau aku jadi berharap ke kamu, gimana?” Pertanyaan seperti ini sungguh menunjukkan bahwa apa yang dilakukan si Mas benar-benar berhasil merebut hatimu, segala perlakuan layaknya pacar, pacar yang tidak dianggap. Kamu merasa dispesialkan, apalagi saat si Mas menitipkan boneka yang dinamakan Tigri pada dirimu. Kamu pun langsung mempostingnya di akun sosmedmu. Sebelumnya pun, kamu selalu senang menunjukkan foto-foto kebersamaanmu dengan si Mas. Foto pertama, foto disini, foto disana, foto sesuatu untuknya, foto dirimu hasil jepretan mudah darinya, foto barang-barang yang kalian gunakan bersama, sampai sebuah foto saat si Mas merangkulmu ‘biasa’ yang kamu rasa begitu special. Kamu merasa si Mas milikmu seutuhnya :" lagi-lagi hanya pengharapan.

Gambar 1.1 Ketika nyaman berubah menjadi pengharapan yang tak berbalas

Aku tau kamu orang yang baik dan sangat berempati. Kamu senang memberikan apa yang kamu punya kepada si Mas kesayanganmu, baik itu materi, tenaga, bahkan perasaan dan pridemu pun kamu lewatkan begitu saja. Kamu terlalu baik sampai ga bisa membaca hal-hal simple yang ada tepat di depanmu. Tapi aku sedih saat kamu merasa dibawa begitu tinggi dan tak pernah sadar bahwa kamu sudah begitu jauh dari tanah.

Memang benar, kita ga selalu bisa dapetin apa yang kita pengen. Dan inilah faktanya. Pada awalnya, kamu hanyalah teman baik. Kemudian, kamu digunakannya sebagai pengalih dari kekasihnya. Bagaimana dia merasa tidak sehat untuk selalu bersama kekasihnya karena membuatnya tidak fokus dan ingin selalu bisa menjadi lebih bagi kekasihnya, tanpa perlu melebihkan dirinya sendiri. Dan kamulah, kamulah media pengalihnya. Walaupun faktanya pengalihan itu pun tidak berhasil mengalihkan si Mas dari kekasihnya, dan kamu pun tau. Kamu adalah teman yang begitu baik dan loyal, di tengah kehidupan yang begitu memojokkannya, ada secercah sinar dari materi yang kamu punya, yang ga bisa semudah itu dia dapatkan dari kekasihnya. Dia tidak bodoh, dia juga tidak jahat, dia begitu cerdik, dia memilih satu-satunya cara yang paling ampuh untuk membuat wanita percaya. KENYAMANAN. Dan kenyamanan seperti tersebut diataslah yang dia lakukan. Ya, begitulah. Selagi dia berusaha mengerjakan kewajibannya, dia juga mengusahakan dirimu. Lebih tepatnya, berusaha melepaskan diri dari dirimu. Mencari alat untuk melepaskan keterikatanmu dan dia. Mencoba mencari pengganti kesana kemari untuk menutupinya agar dia tidak perlu lagi memenuhimu dengan rayuan-rayuan semu. Kenapa si Mas terus meyakinkanmu bahwa ia sudah tidak bersama kekasihnya? Mudah. Dia sedang membohongi dirinya sendiri, bahwa dia sudah bisa melepas kekasihnya. Tetapi faktanya, dia tidak pernah bisa jauh… Kedua, dia ingin tetap membuatmu dekat, dia tidak ingin kamu jauh karena kalian masih terikat. Dia merasa tidak enak denganmu, dia pun takut kamu tak lagi percaya padanya jika dia menjauhimu. Maka, dia terus melakukan rayuan-rayuan semu padamu. Dia sesungguhnya juga nyaman jika bersamamu, tapi baginya, nyaman bersamamu hanyalah sebatas pertemanan saja. Nyaman menyampaikan segalanya hanya sekedar bercerita, bukan memang ingin mengabarkan keadaannya, seperti yang dia lakukan pada kekasihnya. Dia tidak bisa merasakan hal yang sama seperti yang dia rasakan kepada kekasihnya. Itulah yang selalu membuatnya bolak-balik pada kekasihnya, dimana kekasihnya mengetahui keberadaanmu dan begitu mengerti perasaanmu dan selalu ingin mundur sesaat untuk dirimu dan si Masmu, memberi waktu untuk si Mas agar dapat menyelesaikan segala 'hal terikat' tersebut, karena kekasihnya tau itu menyangkut kelangsungan hidupnya. Sampai si Masmu berhasil membayar semuanya padamu sehingga dia tak perlu lagi merayu-rayumu.

Gambar 1.3 Salam manja di suatu pagi yang mengikuti sekotak sarapan khusus untuk si Mas

Tidakkah kamu merasa bahwa disaat kamu begitu membanggakannya di setiap akun sosmedmu, dia malah tetap membanggakan kekasihnya? Tidakkah kamu merasa, tiada suatu hal yang benar-benar dia lakukan dan perjuangkan untuk meng-impressmu? Betapa dia hanya nyaman denganmu di porsi yang sangat berbatas dan begitu merayumu hanya untuk mendapat kepercayaanmu. Betapa dia berjuang berada di dekatmu hanya karena kebutuhannya dan bukan karena melihatmu di masa depan bersamanya. Seperti yang pernah kamu tanyakan padanya, “Apakah kamu melihatku di masa depanmu?” Tentu saja dia hanya memberikan jawaban diplomatis, karena lagi-lagi kamu terlalu menunjukkan bahwa semua yang kalian lakukan adalah perasaan yang tulus adanya. Ya tulus, tulus hanya dari dalam dirimu. Kamu begitu terlena, terlena dengan hubungan tanpa status dan kamu merasa spesial didalamnya. Kamu wanita yang keras di luar, tapi hampa dan lembut di dalamnya. Sekali kamu disentuh lelaki, runtuhlah segala kerasnya hatimu, terlihat dari bagaimana kamu berbicara dan mendengarkan dan menanggapi serta mengingat kata-kata si Masmu yang menurutmu begitu menyadarkanmu, yang padahal disisi dia, dia tak merasa sedikit pun ada yang spesial dari percakapan itu, hanya karena dia sudah malas menanggapi saja.

Bagaimana lelaki yang tidak memiliki rasa pada kita begitu selow melakukan hal-hal yang bagi perempuan sangat special dan berarti. Dari 10 hal yang dilakukan bersama bagi wanita special, mungkin hanya 2 atau 3 yang menurutnya special juga. Itu ketika si laki-laki tidak memiliki rasa atau hanya menganggapmu teman saja sedangkan kamu sudah merasakan hal yang menggebu-gebu padanya. Hasil hipotesis di atas tidak berlaku pada laki-laki dan wanita yang saling memiliki perasaan yang sama besar. Kalau begitu, jujur, lebih susah lagi diteliti. Karena terkadang malah si wanitanya yang kurang peka dan cuek dengan hal-hal manis yang sedang dilakukannya dengan kekasihnya (ceritanya curhat :p).

Last but not least, aku sangat memperhatikanmu kaka peri. Semenjak kamu datang di SEPERSEJUTA-UPIL-dibanding-LUASNYA-ALAM-SEMESTA kehidupanku. Tapi jangan dulu pede karena diperhatikan olehku :3 itu semua karena aku selalu mencoba membuatmu sadar, tapi ternyata kamu sudah terlalu dibutakan cinta yang tak berbalas. Aku tau apa yang sebenarnya terjadi dan apa yang sedang di setting dibalik situasi ini, karena aku terlibat di dalamnya. Kami tidak jahat, tidak. Ini bukan aib atau hal yang buruk, ini adalah sebuah pembelajaran. Semua orang punya masalahnya masing-masing. Nenek-nenek bejenggot pun tau itu. Jadi, mulai sekarang don’t judge people easily. People don’t come from the same background and treatment. Tentunya engga cuma kamu aja yang dijadikan peralihan atau persinggahan atau ngerasa dimanfaatin. Kamu kenal betul apa yang kamu rasain dalam hatimu, jadi percaya aja, bahwa si Masmu ini tidak sejahat cowok-cowok di sinetron dengan kisah hampir sama seperti ini. Kalau memang menjadi unofficial seperti ini saja sudah membuatmu bahagia dan sebegitu nyamannya, apalagi kalau dibuat official. Hati-hati terbang terlalu tinggi JJJ

Be committed to your own word, "STEP OFF". Keep your heart and brain synchronized, don’t let this down you. You’re too awesome to be the second choice. Atas nama pemeran aseli kisah tersebut, saya memohon maaf apabila ada salah-salah perlakuan dan kata-kata yang menyakitkan. Yeah, it’s life J

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First year!

Welcome back! I'd like to welcome my self as returning to share something to this blog again. It's (still) concerning about my story. And this time, *drum roll* I'd tell ya about the things that happened throughout the first year in my college life.

I was 18 years old when I first came up here. I never planned of being the student of Undip but I was destined to make Semarang become more important city than it was before. And yeah now it does. I barely know the people here, my friend that come in the same major was not many, only three of us. I had to mingle and made friends. So, what did I get? A lot! I found my friend and more than that, bestfriends {} 

I feel so match with them and there's no doubt that we're clinging each other wherever we go. Although we have different activities, we still have time to be together, at least just to share some hot news. We seems so happy but deep down inside we're hiding all the sadness. We're not perfect but we (still) try to find the perfect man :3

That's actually the basic thing that I need to survive in Semarang. Friend. I had already one from high school. She's Vira and she's majoring Civil Engineering

I'll never feel so safe without my friends around. Thank God they accept me for who I am. The college atmosphere is so much different with high school. At school, what we are gonna do was so limited by the strict rules and the teachers were so concerned about us. While in college, we're free to do, to act, to speak everything. Not so free sih, but it's really up to us whether we want to be good or bad cause we're living independently. 

The first semester was really the time to absorb so much information that I could get. And I learned to adapt with the new environment as fast as I could. I tell you, man. At that busy and labile period, that wasn't so good to start a new relationship. It'll be broke. Please, Nad. Stop sharing your sadness and failure again, that's a big NO NO. Olrait olrait, let's move on! :') That was my first term and I started to make plan about the things that I'm gonna do in the next term and the next year.

The second semester was approaching and I started to make my plan become real. 'Contributing in college organization'. And I did it. Until now, I still active in 2 organizations, BEM-FT and HMTI.

It's not easy to be involved in 2 different organizations. However, I did learn a lot of things. I learned how to interact with new people, how to mingle and adapt that fast, how to solve problem by using independent mind, how to always be well-prepared with the plan B, how to work under pressure but still think clearly, and so on. It really does develop me into someone better who can see things in different perspective. In BEM and HM, I also found my new family. We came from different batch but we learned together in a family way.

At last, how can't I be so grateful? I never feel misplace being here. I think Allah has a well-planed about me and that might be the best. 

Selamat Menunaikan Ibadah Puasa 1434 H

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The Story of Us

She doesn't easily fall. She doesn't have spesific type about man either. She's smart at hiding her feeling. In the other hand, she's a bit fragile. She thinks that telling everybody about  what she feels inside isn't really needed. As she believes that no other person could feel the same as she suffers. Sometimes she doesn't need someone to give her advice but needs someone who can just lying down and listening for a while. 

Like Taylor Swift's song with the same title as this posting, "The story of us looks a lot  like a tragedy now". It does become a BAD tragedy. Also the huge pile of damage caused of it. "Meeting you is a fate. Becoming your friend is a choice. But falling into you is uncontrolable "

Chapter 1

When the fate made the two of them knew each other by texting. They started to ask about basic thing of college. Day by day~ And the talking became deeper and deeper even without they realized. Everything seemed fine. The communication really went smoothly. He could make her up while they're already talking although it was just by phone. It's just simple things. They laughed at every single one another's joke. But through it she felt already knew him for a long time. They're already close enough when they decided to finally meet. 

Chapter 2

She couldn't even notice about the first impression while the sparks flew instantly between them. She doesn't know whether she's the only one who feel it. But the two of them enjoyed the date. He asked her out even more since then. Their communication got more often than before. Just let it flow, let it takes where it wants them to go. Until he opened the doors and showed the things that she never seen it before. He opened her eyes and made her believe. He said his choice was right and he's so in love. They're in love...

Chapter 3

She had never felt so much loved before. She had never be treated like he treated her that way. They already talked about the future like they had a clue. They had tons of wild imagination. But time passed away and people's feeling change.  She kept on searching but she found nothing that might be went wrong on her. It's such a shame they were apart. Cause people were so envy of them and the sweetness they shared. Never thinking they would lose eachother. After all the beautiful short period of time, the feeling just faded away that easy. Did it come so fast so it went so easy too? Or is it actually not real? Is it actually never happened?  He used to say sweet things, but it used to be real sweet and now it's just hurt. She doesn't know whether it's killing him the way it's killing her and the pain she's in or not. There's no final meet to seal any bad thoughts. Never feel silence could be this loud.

He made his best effort to avoid her. Always trying to look busy and held his pride. Why do they have to pretend that it's nothing? Why do they have to make it's like a contest of who can act like they careless? The short existence of their togetherness never be regretted.  Although now they only become stranger with some memories. It can't be deleted, just hiding it from the surface cause it can ruin everything. Don't blame him cause his feeling and mind are changing all of the sudden. Don't blame her cause falling for unresponsible boy. They don't have any power to resist and forget either.

~The End~

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