The Pursuit of Job

After college is the turning point for a person to become young adult. After all the hecticness of finishing thesis, the tension of sidang and the euphoria of graduation, you come to this point. Yeah, where do you wanna go? What do you wanna do? Cause people would always asking, "Abis ini mau ngapain? Mau kerja dimana? Apa mau lanjut kuliah? Apa mau langsung nikah?" The pressure got more intense when your friends even the closest ones are already getting a job right after graduate. I personally kind of mainstream person who ideally have a plan to going to university after high school and going to get a permanent job after university, settle, married, have a kid, add another one, being old as a happy individual with the life-mate and die. So now, I'm in this period of life, attempting to get employed in a company or institution and making that company more profitable while I only get less than 1% of that. Sounds logical as I'm just a very little piece tiny of dust in this whole industry. 

At first, I felt so confident about my skill, especially my communication skill, that can help me to get a job easily. Those cool skills I got from college cause I did pass my college life quite well, not very extraordinary but it's beyond my expectation. Unfortunately, life happens not in your own straight plan. I got this opportunity to be an intern in Pertamina, I thought (until now) it's a good thing for me to kill time while I'm looking for the good one, and being paid is the most important. As an information, an internship program in Pertamina won't let you just be accepted as their employee right away, you still need to take the whole recruitment process (if it's opened) from the start. No no, don't be too confident that you are highlighted, their recruitment system is still not integrated, it means that the data of all intern doesn't integrates with the list of the applicants which registered at that time. You got my point, right? They wouldn't know whether you are ever be an intern or still be an intern or just a newcomer, unless you are 'dititipin' by someone internal. Heeem heeemm......

But after I 'nyemplung' in this kind of jobseeking, you know, there are thousands of people also did the same as you! What? Tens of thousands! Yeah, even more! And many of them are so skillful, a lot more than you, more attractive, their English so fluent, their experiences whoaaahhh you never imagined they really did too many things in only 4 years of college time. Then, this mean-drop-down thought came to me, "Gilak, Nad! Lo ga bakal kerja-kerja kalo kek gini. Saingan sama orang-orang macam gitu? Lo boleh mikir lo anak hebat, tapi mereka luar biasa! Tuh liat prestasinya kelas internasional semua, pengalaman magangnya aja bejibun itu pas kuliah lho, mana orangnya asik lagi, pinter ngomong, bisa adaptasi sama orang baru, komunikasinya beuuhhh, bermutu! Nah lo gimana, Nad?" Fyuuuhhh. 

I've been applied for more than hundred times, state-owned or private or multi national company, ada yang satu perusahaan sampe 2 kali tapi via different source (web or email), and been called by dozens but not all I can make it or just felt that I didn't have to go, yaa lot of reasons. Ada yang karena bentrok dan gabisa di reschedule atau emang karena pas tanya dan research sana sini yaa kurang bagus disitu. I can't tell every detail of my experiences from taking many companies recruitment process cause it needs days or weeks haha but I can make it short. In every recruitment, they have at least 3 steps, psikotest -  interview - med check or written test - FGD - interview, or maybe combination of them and it could be more than 3 steps, it's relative, depends on the company and their needs. In my experience, I've been failed in every single those steps and succeeded in many too. However, I'm still not settle yet. I've never experienced MCU or being offered yet. It's been 6 months... 

As a human being young adult, I feel disappointed, frustrated, wanna give up. But I choose to bounce back. I'm feeling grateful that I still have something to do, Good thing I still have income at least for my own expenses. If I only moan or grumble all the time, especially in social media (that's the un-coolest!), that'd only be making everything even worse. Deeply I feel calmer (when I had some rejections) after I keep reminding myself that Allah has plan, Allah knows me best. I believe that what I'm having now is something I deserve, it's the best that could happen to me at that time. I believe that by all the failures, Allah wants me to learn, to take something from that, to use up all the fails. I started not to overthink about 'pejuang' lainnya, what they had and what they got. It's a waste of energy. I learned that I just need to focus on my potency and passion. What do I really wanna do. Everyone has different life path, right? The bad thing is the pressure. People are so judgmental, and I hate knowing that they feel pity on me. It's just me still working out. People never have a clue about the process I've been doing. No one could understand and no one could really motivate me even just by saying "Tenang aja, rejeki ga kemana kok.". Bener deh. It's just me and myself. No. It's me and my own thought. I decide when I want to feel down and when I want to move on. And again, back to our Creator. Just let Him do the rest while we're taking our ass out there.